February's Beautiful Picture from Tennessee

Our first and only real snowfall, and the snow melted before the thrid day. I love Tennessee.

Best Friends

I heard the Michael W. Smith song "Friends" this evening. It's not my favorite song in the world, though it's not bad. I suppose I don't really like it because it always seems to be sung at really emotional times, and I tend to be an emotional girl.

But it got me thinking about my best friend, of course, and I realized that one of the main problems with running my own business in the middle of nowhere is that I don't see enough of my best friend.

Living in Luxembourg was difficult because of the time difference. It gave me a very limited window where I could call my parents or my friends back in the States. One nice thing about being in Tennessee is that I'm only one time zone away from most of my friends.

I've had a really difficult time connecting with people around here. I guess I'm just too different from anyone around here. It's hard to find common ground.

I suppose the moral of the story is that I need to spend some time investing in the friendships I do already have with the people that understand me, especially now that there isn't such a big time difference.

Health Insurance

It's been almost two years now since I left my good government job in DC and my good government health insurance. We had health insurance in Luxembourg, I suppose, but we never understood how to use it if we needed it (like when my middle child was bitten and scratched badly by the neighbor's cat), and we never understood how to get preventative care, like cancer screenings.

So this week, my husband started permanently at the job where he has been a temp through Kelly Services for the past eight months. So this week, for the first time in almost two years, we have health insurance.

I am old enough now that I should have had a mammogram or two by now. I've never had one. It's been over two years since I've had a pap smear. The girls haven't had a check-up in over five years. It's been over three years since any of us have been to a dentist, and the two older girls need orthodontia.

We have been doing fine financially. My husband's job is enough to pay the bills, and now my consulting business is taking off and I'm bringing in some money also. But all it would have taken in these past months is one bad illness or one bad car accident, and we would have been in big trouble financially. And though you try not worry, it's something that comes often to your mind.

I think that one of the factors that triggered my mid-life crisis and made me really want to quit my job at the Census Bureau was the death of my good friend Mary Ellen from ovarian cancer. She was only 42 when she passed away. So I quit my job and move to Europe and then move back to the States, and we're in a situation where we don't have health insurance. And you can't help but think that it doesn't matter how old you are---a health crisis can happen at any age.

My leaving the Census Bureau got us out of the DC area. We're in a house we love on land we love. The girls are adjusting to life here, though they still miss their friends in Virginia (as do I). We really are back on the track to having some stability.

It's easy to second guess the choices we've made. If I'd known we'd be without health insurance for two years, maybe I wouldn't have left my good government job. But maybe that's why God never lets us really see what lies ahead. So is it better not to know so that you take a chance, and then it all works out in the end? Or should I have been more careful, and not decided I and my family should be without health insurance right when I turned 40?

In the end, it doesn't matter. We're happy and healthy, and I'm learning to really appreciate my new life in Tennessee.

But if you're thinking about having a mid-life crisis, it's very important to think about health insurance. Don't count on having a safety net even if you move to a country with socialized medicine.